This was not the topic I was intending to write about but sometimes situations arise and you can't help but voice your outrage and concern.
A friend recently came home from a VBAC birth and told me how the doctor basically told her client to stop wasting her time, it was just going to be a ceserean any way, he refused to take responsibility for her and that walking around was a complete waste of time. The client did everything she could and my friend had her doing things we never knew a labouring woman could accomplish while in active labour.
Unfortunately after more then 24 hrs it did end up in a ceserean section.
But why would a doctor come into a hopeful and happy situation and burst every balloon in the room with his words. When a woman is in labour she is so open to the connotations of words. A woman who feels supported and loved and safe will do amazing things during her labour. Her discomfort will be diminished, her labour will go faster, she will not fear the process and listen to her body, and she will preceive the birth in a much better light regardless of the outcome when her basic human needs are met.
Now I'm not saying that in the case of my friend her client would have had a vaginal birth if her doctor hadn't been such a mean guy, but perhaps she would have had a better outcome, a more pleasant experience, a shorter experience, who knows.
Kindness costs nothing, it doesn't infringe on our health care costs but the benefits are huge and it would go a long way if doctors and nurses and friends and family would remember that when talking to a pregnant or labouring woman.
That's my soap box for today, perhaps I'll get to write the next post I was planning on and chat about why you aren't too fat, short or old to have a baby.
Monday, April 20, 2009
Thursday, April 2, 2009
How to Hire a Doula?
The last few weeks I've been hearing a lot of people ask questions about hiring a doula and what to look for. In fact just yesterday I recieved a call from a woman who had been 'chatting' with a woman who claimed to be a doula and it all sounded very suspect. In fact she had originally spelt the word doula wrong. My advice in that case...run away!
So I thought I'd put a few things down that will help the novice pregnant family look for, interview and hire a doula.
First!
Why are you hiring a doula? Do you even know what one is?
"A doula is a professional who provides emotional, physical, informational and practical support for the expectant, laboring or postpartum mother. She does not perform any medical tasks but actually compliments the medical birth team."1
Consider what you kind of support you are looking for. How do you envision your birth or postpartum period going? Do you need support during your pregnancy and labour? Then you are looking for a labour doula. Are you looking for support after you come home with the baby? Breastfeeding support or help with twins? Then you are looking for a postpartum doula.
Many doulas are both labour and postpartum doulas so if you need or want both then you need to ask the doulas you speak to what their services include.
Second!
Where do you find a doula?
Ask your friends and coworkers if they had a doula or if they know someone who did. Word of mouth goes a long way in hiring a doula. If that search leaves you empty handed turn to the internet.
You can start by a google search. "Doula Toronto" and see what you get?
Or you can search the many different doula referal sites such as:
http://www.torontodoulagroup.com/
http://www.doulacare.ca/
http://www.babyontheway.ca/
Third!
Once you've found and called several doulas (you can email as well but I suggest calling) get a feel by the ones you speak to who ou might like to meet in person. Each doula should offer a 'no obligation, no cost' interview to chat and answer questions with both you and your partner. If they don't, then they are not the doula for you.
I suggest interviewing 3 or 4. If you only have one or two that's okay too, but make sure that the doula you hire is the one for you. If it doesn't feel right or you just don't connect with the doula then they aren't the doula for you. Keep in mind too that the doula has to get a feel for you too. If she does not feel the connection then she may decline being hired. Don't take it personally, if she's not feeling it then she won't be at her best for you when you really need her.
But what do I ask?
You want to know where they trained? When they trained and if they are certified. Being certified is not the be all and end all but it is an extra step in training that I feel shows dedication to their field and respect for their training and continuing education. Now you may find that a doula you really connect with is in the process of getting their certification or has done a hundred births but is not certified. Don't worry.
As long as they are trained by a reputable training organization and is a member in good standing then you are good to go. As I said, being certified is not the be all and end all so don't get hung up on it if the doula you like isn't certified.
Fourth!
Check their creditentials. Go to the websites of the organizations they trained with or call them and see if they are a member in good standing. Are they a member of any other organization, call them and see if they are a member in good standing. If they aren't, you won't be able to find out why but that is a red flag! run away.
Fifth!
Ask questions. Labour Doula
What made them decide to become a doula?
How long have they been a doula?
How many births have they done?
How many births do they do in a year?
What do their services include?
Do they work with a back up Doula?
What are the terms of their contract?
What additional services to they offer?
What is their childbirth philosophy?
What is their opinion on pain medication?
When during the labour do you call the doula?
Do they have references?
Where and with whom did they train?
Cost?
Postpartum Doula
What kind of training and experience do they have?
How do they see the role of the doula?
What kind of services do they offer?
Are there different packages available?
Ask for references?
Why did they decide to become a doula?
What do they find is the most challenging aspect of their work?
How will they help the partner/family/older children?
Do they have back up?
What can you expect from a typical day?
Do they help with breastfeeding?
Are they opposed to bottle feeding?
Finally, I've alluded to training organizations. The two main ones are CAPPA, and DONA.
Have a look at their websites, you'll be able to find doulas on their sites too.
http://www.cappacanada.ca/
http://www.dona.org/
And trust your instincts! Hiring a doula is 50% experience and 50% personality. There is a doula for every woman and a woman for every doula. You'll find the right one, she's out there waiting for you.
1. The Doula Advantage by Rachel Gurevich - available a most Chapter and Indigo stores.
So I thought I'd put a few things down that will help the novice pregnant family look for, interview and hire a doula.
First!
Why are you hiring a doula? Do you even know what one is?
"A doula is a professional who provides emotional, physical, informational and practical support for the expectant, laboring or postpartum mother. She does not perform any medical tasks but actually compliments the medical birth team."1
Consider what you kind of support you are looking for. How do you envision your birth or postpartum period going? Do you need support during your pregnancy and labour? Then you are looking for a labour doula. Are you looking for support after you come home with the baby? Breastfeeding support or help with twins? Then you are looking for a postpartum doula.
Many doulas are both labour and postpartum doulas so if you need or want both then you need to ask the doulas you speak to what their services include.
Second!
Where do you find a doula?
Ask your friends and coworkers if they had a doula or if they know someone who did. Word of mouth goes a long way in hiring a doula. If that search leaves you empty handed turn to the internet.
You can start by a google search. "Doula Toronto" and see what you get?
Or you can search the many different doula referal sites such as:
http://www.torontodoulagroup.com/
http://www.doulacare.ca/
http://www.babyontheway.ca/
Third!
Once you've found and called several doulas (you can email as well but I suggest calling) get a feel by the ones you speak to who ou might like to meet in person. Each doula should offer a 'no obligation, no cost' interview to chat and answer questions with both you and your partner. If they don't, then they are not the doula for you.
I suggest interviewing 3 or 4. If you only have one or two that's okay too, but make sure that the doula you hire is the one for you. If it doesn't feel right or you just don't connect with the doula then they aren't the doula for you. Keep in mind too that the doula has to get a feel for you too. If she does not feel the connection then she may decline being hired. Don't take it personally, if she's not feeling it then she won't be at her best for you when you really need her.
But what do I ask?
You want to know where they trained? When they trained and if they are certified. Being certified is not the be all and end all but it is an extra step in training that I feel shows dedication to their field and respect for their training and continuing education. Now you may find that a doula you really connect with is in the process of getting their certification or has done a hundred births but is not certified. Don't worry.
As long as they are trained by a reputable training organization and is a member in good standing then you are good to go. As I said, being certified is not the be all and end all so don't get hung up on it if the doula you like isn't certified.
Fourth!
Check their creditentials. Go to the websites of the organizations they trained with or call them and see if they are a member in good standing. Are they a member of any other organization, call them and see if they are a member in good standing. If they aren't, you won't be able to find out why but that is a red flag! run away.
Fifth!
Ask questions. Labour Doula
What made them decide to become a doula?
How long have they been a doula?
How many births have they done?
How many births do they do in a year?
What do their services include?
Do they work with a back up Doula?
What are the terms of their contract?
What additional services to they offer?
What is their childbirth philosophy?
What is their opinion on pain medication?
When during the labour do you call the doula?
Do they have references?
Where and with whom did they train?
Cost?
Postpartum Doula
What kind of training and experience do they have?
How do they see the role of the doula?
What kind of services do they offer?
Are there different packages available?
Ask for references?
Why did they decide to become a doula?
What do they find is the most challenging aspect of their work?
How will they help the partner/family/older children?
Do they have back up?
What can you expect from a typical day?
Do they help with breastfeeding?
Are they opposed to bottle feeding?
Finally, I've alluded to training organizations. The two main ones are CAPPA, and DONA.
Have a look at their websites, you'll be able to find doulas on their sites too.
http://www.cappacanada.ca/
http://www.dona.org/
And trust your instincts! Hiring a doula is 50% experience and 50% personality. There is a doula for every woman and a woman for every doula. You'll find the right one, she's out there waiting for you.
1. The Doula Advantage by Rachel Gurevich - available a most Chapter and Indigo stores.
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